Prep:
Okay so I was running a bit behind today, but I was talking to a friend about the altar and what I wanted to do with it, and I was kind of torn - I wanted to put it in the gazebo so I could do my rituals outside and still have it protected, I was just going to do something simple, statue of the Goddess, an apple, maybe a red rose and a sea shell. But I can't get internet connection out there, and since in the last post
we determined we were going to do it via skype, that means I have to do it inside the house. So I basically took my regular altar and tweaked it. My regular working altar is on my old headboard, which is screwed into the wall of my old bedroom - now my study, and it has the main portion of it as a shadow box for when I competed in dressage shows, I would but my ribbons in there. But I have had it cleared out for a while now, and didn't know what to do with it. So I went online and I searched for a whole bunch of different pictures. I searched for 'Aphrodite' 'Venus' 'sexuality' 'self esteem' 'love' and I found 10 different pictures that I thought helped to express what I wanted to get out of this journey. Then I printed them out and taped them into the shadow box(see close up photo), and hung the cords I already have on the wire inside. Then I closed the plexiglass and my aphrodite altar is now combined with my regular working altar. Ta-da! So this is what it looks like all together (see photo).
Honestly I felt a little scrambled this time because I had such a buildup to the first chord and I was so excited for it, and then at the last minute I was like "OMGs I have so much left to do!" It didn't help that I got up today and my dad gave me a lecture about not helping out, so I had to do all the prep work for dinner tonight, and then find the pictures... I was still taping them into the altar case when Amanda skype called me to start ritual. Then I realized that I didn't have my dedication written out when we were in the middle of beginning. We did the casting the circle, calling the elements/quarters, welcomed the Goddess and God and we finished the chanting to raise energy before I realized I didn't have my dedication done. Ugh. Well fly by the seat of your sarong it is.Dedication: I dedicate my work both written and spoken to accepting that things I cannot change about myself, changing the things I can, loving myself holistically no matter what I look like, and I offer my love and gratitude to the Goddess in return for helping me work on my self-love and self-esteem.
Looking for Aphrodite: The Goddess of Love is found everywhere that love is present, in the heart, in the mind, in the eye of the beholder, in the bathtub when I'm enjoying a bubblebath, in the bedroom during those more intimate moments, under the full moon, on the beach (she is a water goddess too, after all.
Invoking Aphrodite: I call upon Aphrodite, sea-born Goddess of love and beauty to help me to love myself holistically, inside and out, completely so I may love others more fully as well. Please teach me to see you in myself and other women.
The ritual of the first cord: Saturnine and I, as previously stated, skyped up and then called the circle and all that jazz into order. We chanted "Strong like the Ocean, Gentle like Rain, River wash my tears away, Aphrodite" to raise energy, and then we started in on our 'Guided Journey' Saturnine reading it for me and then I read it for her. Despite the static that broke it up a bit while she was reading, I actually did have a pretty good experience with it. I've gotten to the point where I think I understand how I meditate and I visualize things differently than everyone else. I don't see things with my eyes the way most people do, instead I see things with my sense of touch and hearing. It 'looks' almost as you'd expect a bat to see things, through echo-location, it's almost as if sound is bouncing off everything, and then I interpret it when I hear it. So everything is a bit fuzzy, but I get the general idea of what it's supposed to be, and then I get a gut instinct that clears it up, not so much visually but internally. So when you step out of the time stream into the gardens, my first feeling was that I was standing on lush green grass, surrounded by carefully trimmed rose bushes that formed almost like a labyrinth of living things as I walked towards the Temple. When Saturnine read that I was to look down at the path and notice what I was walking on, I saw the well worn dirt path with the lush green grass next to it, every so often I'd find a 'main path' which was paved with cobblestones, and grass peeking out in between the stones. When I got to the Temple the steps were white marble with gold veins through it, well worn from years of women walking up the steps, sitting on them to read or enjoy the sunshine and the scent of roses from the gardens. There was a fountain with dolphins jumping out of the water, three of them, almost touching and between their noses was where the water poured upward. Inside there were conversation couches, big overstuffed pillows around altars on the outside walls so women could meditate by their candles. Dead center from the entrance of the Temple was a giant statue of Aphrodite, somewhere between the Born of the Sea like in the painting, and the Venus de Milo statue, but like no statue I've ever seen before. Her eyes seemed to look into your soul as you entered the Temple, but her mouth smiled down at you. To either side of this statues was a door. I took the door to the right, and came upon a medium-sided room with pillars forming a perfect circle in the center of the room, a large altar just behind the circle of pillars, blazing with candles and incense. There were big pillows in jewel tones, rich purple and deep red, amber, blues, greens, at the feet of the pillars, making their own circle. I stepped into the circle, said my dedication and called out for Aphrodite. She joined me, but she was more of a glowing presence, and I couldn't see many details other than the general shape of her, a perfect hour glass, not at all the skeletal thinness of todays models, but owning her own sexuality, with full hips, luscious curves and a Girdle, or belt, slung sexily around her hips, seemed to be formed of the heavens themselves. We danced together and she gave me a silver strand from her Girdle, which became solid in my hands, and then I left the inner sanctum, and went out to sit in the main Temple, there were women laughing and talking, children playing with toys of dolphins, running around giggling. I sat in front of a mosaic on the wall, on a purple pillow and felt the radiating energy from the cord in my hand. Then I got up, went outside and noticed an apple tree I didn't realize was there before, picked an apple and started walking back towards the time stream and home.
We concluded after both of the meditations by dancing to 'Aphrodite and Pan' by Kellianna. Then we closed circle, logged off and I danced to some DRD before coming in here to blog about my experience.
Afterthoughts: I'm glad that I did this, already I feel a bit stronger. I liked the Guided Journey, and I can't wait for the next one, I'm already excited about going back the next time I meditate. I think that I need to figure out a better way to hear, either by calling Saturnine instead of using skype, or something, because the crackling was a bit hard to hear the words while she was talking, but I'm sure we'll figure it out. I also don't think we raised enough energy before beginning, but I'm sure the more times we do it, the more energy we'll get, just from residual energy of the same working over and over. Oh - and the word she whispered to me was 'love'.
Anyways, I'm off to go eat my dinner, so hope this finds everyone in good spirits.
Blessed Be,
Jade
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