OKAY!
I was home alone house sitting and watching my dog, and he was rooting around in the back yard in the corner near the other yard that has like 7 dogs that live there, and my friend who was over decided to go over the fence on a little recon job to see what was going on that the dogs were making so much noise about when she got back she said that it was almost entirely mud, but you couldn't tell what was shit and what was dirt, and they seemed to be fighting over bones... then the dogs started to sound like they were going insane and fighting eachother, and jd started acting funny... i looked at him and his eyes had like a black film that were spreading all the way over them so his eyes looked entirely black and then he started to try to attack me... I threw him a bone outside and he tore after it even though he's really old and shouldn't be able to run like that
so i'm like wtf... so I go over the fence to see what's going on, there's only 2 dogs left... both of their eyes are black as pitch and their owner is dead on the ground and that's what they were fighting over... her leg bones..
so i'm freaked out... and i try to make a run for it, but they're really fast and they try to corner me... but apparently in the movie of my dreams i'm like a terrific athelete and i dodge their attacks, sending the one barrelling into the other and while they're distracted i run at and jump the really high fence only to find JD standing there staring at me and drooling
and i'm like FUCK ... but just at that moment a cat comes into the yard and he's distracted and i run for the house and lock the door... strip out of my now disgusting clothes and go to my room to get clean clothes and call the humane society... when i get back to the kitchen my friend has margarita's in the blender and her eyes are black and she is saying we should get drunk and have a fun night
i try to act normal while calling 911 instead of the humane society, i tell her to go downstairs and i'll be down in a sec, i'm just going to call in the noise complaint and then when the operator picks up i tell them the neighborhood dogs are going insane, i think my friend caught it and is trying to get me drunk to eat me and to please come help... and then i woke up
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